Do you remember the exact moment the butterflies took off after the honeymoon phase? The moment reality tapped you on the shoulder and reminded you to touch grass. Or that moment your teacher asked you to solve an equation on the board while you were busy daydreaming in class, paying no attention to the lesson. That three-second heart jump after being pulled out of your dream, the only time you have to whisper a quick prayer to God, hoping you actually know the answer. Yet secretly, you’re a little upset… because your dream was just about to reach its climax.
I am a dreamer, but the man standing before me is a realist. While I imagine, he calculates; and while I dance in the rain, he stands there with an umbrella and waits for me to finish. I am the woman who always wants five more minutes after the alarm has already rung, while he is already up and ready to go design our Kingdom. He believes time is money, and although he is right, to me, time is the most expensive currency, and I only want to spend it with him.
However, one truth will always remain: I will never romanticize poverty. So how do I merge our two worlds together? And no, my Bloomers, I did not make a mistake by using the word “I” I chose it intentionally. Because in his world, our worlds were already merged. It was I who needed to catch up.
He lets me be me. He doesn’t complain. Sometimes he’s exhausted, yes, but he understands that with great purpose comes great responsibility. He can come home after a long day and still find me dancing in the rain, and his first instinct isn’t to stop me, it’s to cover me. Because he has chosen me, and this is what he gets.
I am not in denial about being a late bloomer. But blooming teaches you responsibility. It teaches you that love isn’t about erasing yourself or losing your world; it’s about learning how to meet someone in the middle and build a shared one.
My first step was recognizing that the man placed before me is a man walking in his purpose. And if he is called, then I must also be called. So I asked myself: How do I step into his world without losing mine? How do I meet him softly? How do I run toward him, carrying the rain with me, just so I can stand beneath his umbrella… and kiss him, not because I have to, but because I want to?
The real question is this: how do two worlds merge without one disappearing? How do I become peace to a man who carries so much on his shoulders? How do I love him in a way that feels like rest to his spirit, the same way his presence feels like safety to mine?
I began to understand that being called is not about perfection; it’s about purpose. A man who is called by God is a man who knows where he is going, even when the road is hard. And if he is walking in purpose, then loving him means learning how to walk beside purpose, not against it.
So it’s okay, baby. I understand that an extra hour with me today could shift the trajectory of your tomorrow. And because I am walking beside you on this journey, I also share in its weight. So I choose to move in alignment with you.
What does that look like, you might ask? It looks like consideration becoming your first language of love. It looks like trusting that his calculations truly add up. It looks like setting your alarm a little earlier so you can still have the extra five minutes you love without disrupting the plans of the day. It looks like him coming home early sometimes just to find joy in watching you dance. It looks like him making time for you without you having to beg for it. It looks like him supporting your dreams and learning what lights you up. It looks like two people choosing harmony.
But I couldn’t have understood any of this before I bloomed. Before blooming, I didn’t know love like this existed. I didn’t know that not every man is walking in purpose. Some are just drifting, and how could I not feel drained when those were the men I was following? Lost men.
We’ve been taught to believe that a successful man with money must already be living in his purpose. But that isn’t always true. Money does not equal purpose. Only a man who truly walks with God can know his purpose ,not someone who reads a few verses or visits church occasionally, but someone who lives it.
Because I am, by nature, a flower, I was always meant to bloom. I only thought something was wrong with me because I was planted in the wrong environment. I was a flower in dry soil, without water, without sunlight, surrounded by drought and dead crops. Not every rose can grow in concrete. And if you think a rose grew from concrete, then there must have been soil beneath it somewhere.
If no one is pouring into you, if no one is nourishing your soul, you cannot flourish. Even the most loving support system cannot water roots they cannot reach.
So, before a healed man can choose you… choose yourself first.
God isn’t withholding love from you. He’s calling you to bloom.
Being loved the way I have always longed to be loved revealed something to me: Safety is what softened me. Safety changed everything. My fear went silent in its presence. Safety awakened my willingness to pour, to nurture, to consider, and to stand beside instead of stand guard.
He didn’t lead with control; he led with peace. And it wasn’t pressure that made me want to support him. It was that same safety. Because when a man who knows his purpose makes you feel safe, submission isn’t something he demands… it’s something your spirit naturally offers.
And if a man does not make you feel safe, he is not the place your softness was meant to rest.
HER PERCEPTION.🌱 